Dear Woman Who Feeds Me:
Thank you for "rescuing" me from the mean streets of Cincinnati and imprisoning me in your library. (That was sarcasm, as I call it "kidnapping.") I have attempted to communicate with you directly, but you insist on repeating my every "meow" right back to me. This is infuriating and obviously an attempt to torture me into revealing classified kitty information. It will not work.
In an effort to negotiate my immediate release, I will henceforth communicate my demands to you in writing.
-Tinker the Kitten (Tink)
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